Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Where To Start

You know, for years people have always asked me why I never blogged my experience through the Sickle journey. I guess a part of me didn't think that people would understand the daily fight that we as Sicklers endure. Even though I have had this disease my whole life, I cant really remember my full fight. The earliest that I can remember is when I was around 12-13. So I will make my first blog entry about that!

I will never forget the day that I woke up to go to school and the moment my feet hit the floor, I fell to the ground. I thought that maybe I just didn't have a good footing, but when I stood up to try again, my left hip hurt so bad that I couldn't stand up at all. I ended up sitting down and calling for my Mom. I wasn't able to put any pressure on my left leg at all. I remember the day before running in gym for about 3 miles because my coach demanded that of me. It hurt a little after, but I didn't think anything of it. My mom immediately called my doctor and we went in to get x-rays. When the Doctor walked in my room after viewing the x-ray, I got, what I felt at the time, the worst news any kid could get.

My Doctor informed me that I had a condition called 'Aseptic Necrosis of the Left Femur.' I looked at him super puzzled because I had no idea what that meant. He then began to tell me that I'd had so many Sickle Cell crises in my left hip that there was barely any bone/tissue left in that area. The Doc determined that my case was pretty severe, but he felt that he could put me in a wheelchair for about 6 weeks to see if he could postpone the surgery. So I went into my 7th grade year in a wheelchair. After my pain became too severe to deal with on a daily basis, we went back to the Doctor. That's when I learned that the next step would completely change my lifestyle. I had to get a Left Hip Replacement surgery.

I bet you're thinking, don't only old people have to get those? I thought the same exact thing. I was beyond scared, especially after being informed of everything that would change. No more running/jumping/lifting anything heavy. Just crazy things that you take for granted. I really had a hard time accepting that this was going to happen to ME. I wont lie, I went into a deep state of depression from this. It was the scariest thing that I have ever had to endure.

The whole hip replacement process was about 3 months long. Coming out of the surgery you are pretty much having to learn how to walk again. I started off using a walker, then slowly progressed to crutches, then on to 1 crutch, until finally I could walk again on my own. I had to wear a certain kind of shoe because one of my legs was obviously longer than the other. The whole process was definitely life altering but in my mind I always knew that there was someone out there with a worse condition than mine. With that being said, I decided to fight to walk rather than stay in a state of depression.

This surgery forced me to grow up a lot faster than I ever wanted to. I felt like I couldn't be a kid anymore. All of the things that I saw my friends do, I had to sit back and watch because I couldn't participate. It took me years before I even wanted to attempt bowling again, in fear that I would take the wrong step and hurt my hip.

Most people would NEVER know that I have a hip replacement unless I mention it. It's not something that I wanted people to know me for, so I wouldn't mention it unless absolutely necessary. One of the reasons I decided to blog on this aspect of my life is because I believe that people think Sickle Cell is only just a disease that causes pain. People don't really know the difficulties that we can go through because of our crises. Its an everyday fight. I am slowly learning to open up about different aspects of how Sickle Cell affects me, because there are people who want to be aware for either themselves or because they know someone who has Sickle Cell. Its so important to stay educated on what can affect you or any family member/friend.

This entry is only one aspect of my every day fight with Sickle Cell. Trust me when I say that there will be more entries to come. I not only want to keep you guys educated but I want to be reminded of the hardships that I went through so that I never give up! So STAY SICKLE SMART!

Until the next entry......